Put in words such as “goals”, “success”, “happiness”, etc and you will find your internet search engine is over crowded with experts, books, formulas, programs, blogs, videos, and so on how to be successful.
I’m throwing the big red Bravo Sierra flag here and now. Just how much success do I need? More important, how do I want to define it? What am I willing to sacrifice to gain it?
What I have come to understand about myself is only a few things. First, I am a go-getter. With very few exceptions outside my control I have done what I want to do at the level I wanted to do it. When in control of my military career, I had opportunities that many in my “position” would not even have a sniff at. Now that I’m out, other goals interest me…and I live a pretty normal life of what I consider success. Sure, I would like to have more in the bank, be a few pounds lighter, and do this Adventure IQ thing full time. But it closely ties with the second…I am not willing to give up my current happiness for what is percieved as bliss.
If they gave out awards for horse shoes and hand grenades I would be a world champion. I don’t have a fear of failure, I am terrified of success. For years I have struggled with this. Those who know me best are often frustrated when I turn down huge opportunities to grow.
What I now realize is that for the most part I’m happy. Sure I have bills I juggle, the budget is strained when we need paint on the house and a new fence, and nine days after payday we tighten our belts every now and then.
How would I even begin to set up metrics for success? By the things I want to buy and the places I want to go? I guarantee that one I buy something, I have a desire to modify, customize, make it my own….and places….only lead to desire to go to more places.
I have lived the life where money was readily available, I could drive myself to be anything I wanted to be or go anyplace I wanted to go….but I am not willing to make those around me suffer….I have made that mistake as well.
Looking back, I have been successful on my metrics….and if those goals or metrics have changed who cares? What I don’t need is someone pointing out the top 10 reasons I’m not a success…because looking at that list, two things are missing….I chose to work on relationships that matter, and holes in my soul today are not filled with driving towards goals in the future and forgoing the present.
I have an awesome family, a way of life that makes the 9-5 grind worth living, validation from my heavenly father, my Jeep, my dog, and every now and then a road trip to keep it in perspective. Would I like to be on a constant road trip where I could live by my blog and podcast? Not if it means giving up the other things that make me happy.